honestly.

today has been a day where i've been lost in my thoughts majority of the time. many people ask me what's wrong, i say i don't know, and they don't believe me. but i honestly do not know. if i did, i may be able to fix it. knowing my luck tho, i couldn't. i never can.
i'm tired of missing people. i'm tired of not being loved back. i'm tired of not knowing other peoples' feelings. i'm tired of being alone. i'm tired of everything in general..
band is killing me.. each day i dislike it more and more. i'm not sure what's going on. i'm having thoughts of dropping it next year. people get too stressed over it, including the director. i'm sick of people having attitude for no reason. i'm so close to just ripping peoples' heads off and/or screaming at the top of my lungs until i lose my voice.
the only positive thing i have to say/think about right now is homecoming. i'm sooo stoked for it. my dress is amazing. i'm making new friends that i hope to keep. and my convertible is gonna be amazing. :D
sooo, this band named Suicide Silence sounds like satan has eaten their souls, taken over their bodies, and growls/screams with em and they're pretty much amazing. i worship their screams. i wanna be able to do it like them, so bad. >.<
I WISH I KNEW WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME!
so uhhh, i dunno what else to say. so later gators.