my momma. [:

my mom is the absolute best.
my whole 16 years i've been on this earth, she's been giving me what i need and want and pushing me in the best direction.
she works, goes to school, manages seeing my brother and i, has a long relationship, and all kinds of other things.
she's the strongest woman i know.
i want to thank her for everything she does for me.
she's amazing and i hope she realizes it.
i love you with all my heart mom. <3

today.

i'm very, very tired.

tho i'm not sure why because i got a little more sleep last night than i usually do?

i was hyper in the morning. but as the day progressed, i was getting more and more tired.

so, i'm listening to Skillet and their lyrics is making me want to cry. /:

i never cry anymore either!

today's class was pretty good.

he let us out like half an hour early. it's so great when he does that. ^.^

well, nothing else to really talk about so i'm going to get off and go to bed.

goodnighttt. <3

dear you.

you won't read this so i can openly say what i want.
i honestly think about you a few times during the day and at least once while laying in bed, waiting for sleep to meet me.
i know you don't ever think about me anymore but you know what? it still hurts but i'm basically over the fact it's true.
the way you've became, we'll never be together again and i realize this.
i wish it wasn't true because i miss you.
i miss the way you looked at me.
i miss the way you held me.
i miss the way i could be myself around you and you accepted me.
we had sooo many memories together.
how could it just end so quickly?
i never knew how bad i had needed you until i lost you.
we fought a lot but the good definitely outweighed that.
we both lied. i wish i could take mine back.
"i need a hero to save me now." <- this song just came on. that's how i feel about you.
you always knew what to say to make me feel better.
you always tried to help me with whatever problem i was having, NO MATTER WHAT.
and that's one of the many reasons i loved you.
i finally realized i talk about myself too much.. maybe that's why things ended.
i severely regret anything negative i said to you because i never meant it.
you were the most positive thing i had ever had in my life.
this brought me to my senses. i still feel like i'm missing half of me. i hate feeling like i'm just going through life with no reason.
i just wish i could have one more chance...

p.s. i'm not sure who this is to.

honestly.

today has been a day where i've been lost in my thoughts majority of the time. many people ask me what's wrong, i say i don't know, and they don't believe me. but i honestly do not know. if i did, i may be able to fix it. knowing my luck tho, i couldn't. i never can.
i'm tired of missing people. i'm tired of not being loved back. i'm tired of not knowing other peoples' feelings. i'm tired of being alone. i'm tired of everything in general..
band is killing me.. each day i dislike it more and more. i'm not sure what's going on. i'm having thoughts of dropping it next year. people get too stressed over it, including the director. i'm sick of people having attitude for no reason. i'm so close to just ripping peoples' heads off and/or screaming at the top of my lungs until i lose my voice.
the only positive thing i have to say/think about right now is homecoming. i'm sooo stoked for it. my dress is amazing. i'm making new friends that i hope to keep. and my convertible is gonna be amazing. :D
sooo, this band named Suicide Silence sounds like satan has eaten their souls, taken over their bodies, and growls/screams with em and they're pretty much amazing. i worship their screams. i wanna be able to do it like them, so bad. >.<
I WISH I KNEW WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME!
so uhhh, i dunno what else to say. so later gators.

dazed and confused.

first of all, yes, i used a Led Zeppelin song name for my title. but it sooo fits me right now...
i'm honestly just wanting to break down and cry. one of my older best friends has to move away because he got in trouble. now, another friend that's basically became one of my best friends, is moving after christmas break.. we've only hung out a couple of times but text almost everyday. i just don't want him to move schools for some reason. /:
i guess i just feel like i'm being torn away from everyone.. majorrr heartbreak last month, friends turning out to not being friends, people moving away. jeez, i just need time to stop...
i'm not sure if i'm ready to grow up if this is how it is all the time. my emotional being is not stable enough for this kind of stuff. buttt, blogging seems to help a little so i can express my feelings to people, but not knowing who. [feel free to tell me if you read it tho]
on positive note of this crappy day, i got my homecoming dress. [: that's about the only good thing that's happened to me for awhile...

hmmm.

i forgot to mention in last night's post that Kelsey inspired me to start blogging. so yayyy Kelsey! :p


i just got finished with my college math test a little bit ago, phew. i hope i did really good. if i get everything i did right, i should get a 97. how awesome would that be?! :D
i'm totally jamming right now. ^.^
i'm extremely excited for homecoming and i haven't even gotten my dress yet. lol.
so, i wish my feelings would straighten themselves out.. right now, i don't even know what to do. so all i'm doing is... nothing. and that's so unlike me. ugh. i miss more than one person but i want to move on.
right now i'm debating if i want to read or play sims. two of my favorite things to do. lol. i think i'll play sims so later gators. ^.^

introduction to me. [:

well hey you. :p
if you're actually reading this, you're my new best friend.
i'm not sure what exactly blogging is but from what i've gathered, it's about anything you want. so this is perfect for me because i ramble a lot! :D
well, if you don't know me, i shall explain a little about myself.
i'm Leslie [i'm sure you already know this]. i'm addicted to having fun, listening to music, and chilling with my friends. i'm in band, baritone is my instrument. i have a feeling i'm gonna be addicted to blogging so every chance i get i most likely will be typing away. as i type this, the "save now" button keeps blinking because it's saving as a draft like every 2 seconds and it's REALLY getting on my nerves. i go off topic a lot. i have a short memory span, seriously. i've been hurt too many times in my short life. i have a little brother that amazes me every day. my family means everything to me. i don't know what i want to be when i grow up. but i do know that i want a nice paying job and i want to own my own salon on the side with an amazing husband and a few kids. i'd love to make an impact on the world, big or small. i enjoy piercings and tattoos. i have 6 piercings so far; 5 in my ears & then my bellybutton. skulls are cute. my favorite colors are blue, black, red -> in that order. i love math. there's only a handful of people i can actually trust. it takes quite awhile for me to trust guys now. i love making new friends. i hate when people lie. but i've done it, hurt people, and now i regret it to the point i don't do it anymore. i've made a lot of mistakes. i wish i could take a lot of things back. i wish there was a cure for all diseases, especially cancer. i try to help out anyone at any time. i get rather tired of hearing black jokes. surprisingly, i got junior homecoming attendant this year. i'm superrr excited. AND i have 2 totally amazing and cute guys for my escorts. [; the save button is still annoying me. topless by breaking benjamin just came on my itunes. :o i figured out that skillet is an amazing band, just by listening to a few songs of theirs. "friends" aren't supposed to go after one of your serious exboyfriends. but mine does. i'm really hoping i can go to 2 concerts in november. because if i do, i'll die happy. i have a fish. i named him Fishy. thought it suited him quite well.
i didn't realize how long i've been talking about myself so i'm gonna quit now, my bad. xD